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Thoughts on a Palliative Visit


The little blue bear
traps the heat
of your bare skin
on its fur
sitting at your side
cradled in your arm
by accident
a small gesture
of comfort

the machines click
and gasp and
your eyes are still
like his
your chest is still
rising and falling
shifting little bear
I forget you do not
expand on your own
I forget what
is keeping you alive

I look at the bear
I look at the bear

the air is tight around us;
we are a lung
holding its breath.

When this room is empty
of family and IVs
and your beaten frame
I wonder about his fate.
I wonder where he will go
this memento
of choked goodbyes

Will they leave him
is it too hard
remembering him there
a softness at your side
holding your last breaths